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Seaside may lack the more obvious allure of other Oregon coastal towns, but if you have offspring in tow, it’s fairly unbeatable.
Because do your darling children want to hike up Neahkahnie Mountain in classy Manzanita, eat a three-course meal at a charming bistro in Cannon Beach, or tour the historic Flavel House mansion in Astoria?
No, they do not. They want to run feral in the sand, take a bag of saltwater taffy straight to the face, and then go on spinning rides until they might barf. Seaside easily delivers on all three counts.
Even better, it’s the easiest beach to reach from Portland. Point the car west on Highway 26 long enough and eventually you’ll hit Seaside after turning right on Route 101. Once there, it’s the Coney Island of Oregon, only much more manageable. The sounds are maritime, the smells are fried, and the vibes are trashy. For a day of kitschy family fun, it’s perfect.
Proximity to the beach has always been a wonderful bonus to living in Portland, but it is becoming more and more vital as the summers get hotter. It’s usually a good 20 to 30 degrees cooler at the coast, making unpretentious Seaside an easy getaway from the climate change–fueled heat or wildfire hellscapes that now tend to crop up every couple of years.
Young families have even more motivation to get to the ocean because the kids will likely be amped for the trip, and then exhausted on the way home—a classic parenting win-win.
But like all family “fun,” some activities are geared for the kiddos and some favor the parents. On the first hot weekend day in May, we went to Seaside to test the town’s classic tourist attractions. There was one goal: to maximize kid fun while minimizing parental misery. We used an extremely subjective enjoyment ranking system of one to five starfish for younger children up to age 5, schoolkids ages 6 to 18, and their rapidly aging parents.
Carousel in the Mall
The Seaside Mall (300 Broadway, 503-738-6728, seasidecarouselmall.com. 10 am–7 pm Sunday–Thursday; 10 am–8 pm Friday–Saturday;. $5) includes stores for souvenirs, hats, custom caricatures, leather jackets and lattes, all circled around a center carousel. All of the animals go up and down except the giraffe and ostrich. Rides cost $5 (cash only) for a three-minute spin, but standing next to kiddos ages 2 or younger is free. Parents might give it zero starfish for actual ride enjoyment—well, maybe a half star for nostalgia’s sake—but two stars for the vicarious joy of watching their happy kids and, of course, the resulting cute video and photo content.
Young kids: ★★★★
Schoolkids: ★★★
Parents: ★★
Seaside Aquarium
Here’s the thing: Make sure you go to the Seaside Aquarium (200 N Prom, 503-738-6211, seasideaquarium.com; 9 am–5 pm daily; $6–$12) before you ever take your children to the much fancier Oregon Coast Aquarium in Newport 120 miles south, in order to tamp down expectations. There are no sharks or stingrays swimming overhead while you walk through a glass tunnel at the Seaside Aquarium, not even close. This place is tiny and dark and smells like the capelin fish (smelt) used to feed the seals. Like Seaside itself, it’s also awesome for what it is. Among the highlights are the touch tanks where visitors can feel sea anemones’ sticky tentacles, prickly sea urchins, and the rough, muscular sea stars. Plus, a mere $2 will get you a dish of smelt to feed the harbor seals in the public viewing pool, including Damian, a 13-year-old named after Portland Trail Blazers legend Damian Lillard. There’s also a crayon rubbing art station ready for the littles. The whole visit takes about 20 minutes.
Young kids: ★★★
Schoolkids: ★★★
Parents: ★★★
Walk Broadway and the Prom
The centerpiece of the 1.5-mile Seaside Promenade, built in 1920 and known here as “The Prom” (1806 Broadway, seasideoregon.com/seaside-oregon-promenade), is the turnaround with a Lewis and Clark monument. But the real attraction is people-watching, arguably the highest quality of anywhere in Oregon, rivaled maybe only by the Oregon State Fair. Novelty T-shirts observed on one stroll: “Anti Social Moms Club,” “My Favorite Player Is the Hot One,” “Immediately No.” Pray that one of the Seaside bubble artists is out with buckets of soap and big strings making enormous, iridescent bubbles that mesmerize toddlers and stoner parents alike (lots of overlap in interests between those two groups, it turns out). One attracted a big crowd on the dunes near the aquarium at sunset last summer. Teenagers will enjoy popping into the shops on Broadway, especially perennial favorite Ter Har’s (27 Broadway, 503-738-5515, terhars.com), which carries surfing brands like Roxy, Rip Curl and Reef.
Young kids: ★★★
Schoolkids: ★★★
Parents: ★★★
Candy Stores
There’s a reason the phrase “like a kid in a candy store” exists. And like many parenting idioms (“the days are long but the years are short” and “it takes a village”), the truth becomes clear at a bone-deep level once you have kids. Small humans were in abundance at Phillips Candies (217 Broadway, 503-738-5402, phillipscandies.com; 10 am–8 pm daily) and it was not all pretty. But the offerings at the shop, founded way back in 1897, certainly were: popcorn in four flavors, saltwater taffy, and a case of homemade chocolates, including the popular “seafoam” ($30 a pound), which is old-fashioned molasses honeycomb covered in either milk or dark chocolate. One preschooler took in the Phillips offerings, however, and started whining “I want ice cream” with increasing urgency to her grandparents, eventually stomping her sparkly blue jelly sandals and crying. “So many tantrums in here, for real,” said one battle-hardened employee, who offered a few strategies for parents, such as setting a $10 or $20 budget ahead of time, or letting your child fill up a bucket of candy and then letting the cashier choose only five items for purchase. If it all goes sideways and you end up hating your children or someone else’s, the bar at Finn’s Fish House (227 Broadway, 503-738-8330, finnsfishhouse.com) is right next door, where espresso martinis cost $15.
Young kids: ★★★★★
Schoolkids: ★★★★
Parents: ★
The Pacific Ocean
I mean, obviously. This is the main attraction of Seaside, and no trip to town is complete until toes touch the sea. Beach time is a quick way to form core memories for your children—flying kites, building sandcastles, jumping in the waves, night-time bonfires. The price is right (free), but the degree of difficulty can be high. New parents might wonder how to even juggle all of the baby gear plus the beach gear and, oh yeah, the baby itself. (Hint: Load up a sturdy jogging stroller, plus wear a backpack diaper bag.) Setups at Seaside range from elaborate tents and chairs to just a towel and a book. My family tends toward the latter, but that might be because we usually last only about two hours before someone melts down (usually me). But in the best of circumstances, the tots are playing happily in the sand while you read a book or listen to music and think deep existential thoughts about how small humans are. Parents, we still deducted one sea star from your enjoyment score due to how much stuff you have to organize and carry.
Young kids: ★★★★★
Schoolkids: ★★★★★
Parents: ★★★★
Arcades
The carpet at Funland Arcade (201 Broadway, 503-738-7361, funlandseaside.com; 9 am–10 pm Sunday–Thursday, 9 am–11 pm Friday-Saturday) is printed with fireworks because that’s what your headache will feel like after an hour in this place. Upon entry, load up a “power card” with cash (most games cost $1). The first three games available are all first-person shooters; your choice is whether you’d most like to murder dinosaurs, pirates or zombies with a toy machine gun. Less miserable and politically charged are the two air hockey tables, four pinball machines, and six lanes of Skee-Ball. Another cool throwback is the Fascination parlor (50 cents–$1), which dates back to 1950. Participants roll rubber balls toward a five-by-five grid of holes, in what has been called a cross between bowling and bingo (or Skee-Ball and Plinko?). But unlike in Vegas, there’s no alcohol at Funland, the money’s only going to the house, and the food is limited to Fultano’s Pizza.
Young kids: ★★
Schoolkids: ★★★★
Parents: ★
Tilt-a-Whirl, Skooters and Ten Tiny Tees
Funland also operates three classic Seaside attractions across the street: bumper cars, mini golf and the Tilt-a-Whirl (110 Broadway, 503-738-7361, funlandseaside.com; $5). The yellow-awninged amusement rides of your childhood still smell like the metal on metal of the bumper cars plus the on-site $4.50 Pronto Pups hot dog stand—an intoxicating combination. Young families and teenagers in bikini tops shooting video on their phones alike seem delighted on the two-minute ride. How often do people hurl on the Tilt-a-Whirl? “Not as often as you’d think,” the ride operator said, guessing he’s cleaned up puke only about 10 times in three years. For those with strong stomachs, he suggests leaning into the turn to get the car spinning faster; the sweet spot is when centrifugal force glues the back of your head to the metal grate of the car.
Young kids: ★★
Schoolkids: ★★★★★
Parents: ★★
This story is part of Oregon Summer Magazine, our annual guide to refreshing destinations, cool escapes, and the best ways to stay hydrated all summer long. See more stories from Oregon Summer Magazine here, or check this map to see where you can pick up a free copy of the magazine.
