The $20 one-hour massage
They call it a foot massage. How can it possibly take an hour? Can someone really rub your feet for 60 minutes? The secret, of course, is that in the art of reflexology, the foot is broadly defined and also includes the areas attached to your feet by nerves, such as your back and neck. You can spot places offering reflexology up and down 82nd Avenue. I can vouch for Regal Foot Spa (8001 SE Powell Blvd., Suite F, 964-0139), which massages you temple to toe for just $20. My wife compared it to the massage she got on the beaches of Thailand—and for about the same price. Afterward, go all out by hitting the nearby Bambu for a choice of 100-some Thai desserts. MARTIN CIZMAR.
Ancient Chinese medicine for $15
With three Portland locations, Working Class Acupuncture (3526 NE 57th Ave., 335-9440; 4410 SW Beaverton-Hillsdale Highway, 244-7525; 5814 SE 92nd Ave., 477-7115; workingclassacupuncture.org) is on a mission to make ancient Chinese medicine readily available to everyone. Treatment is on sliding scale, from $15 to $35, and you decide what you can pay. Whether you're in mental or physical pain, the friendly acupuncturists deliver a few precise pokes, while soothing music (OK, occasionally the snoring of another patient—treatment is done in a shared room) lulls you to sleep. When you wake up, you'll feel better. Or, if nothing else, it's a great excuse to take a socially acceptable nap. BROOKE GEERY.
The $7 haircut
An especially fine specimen preserved in the timeless amber that is blue-collar Kenton, 7 Bucks a Wack (8321 N Denver Ave., 236-1010) is, has always been, and will probably always be just as the name says: $7. You may have to step around Elvis the dog, or steer clear of the rice cooker stationed next to the combs and clippers, or listen to the salty proprietress, Darlene, air grievances of city RV parking regulations while reruns of The People's Court blare in the background, but the ratio of price to quality is unparalleled. Darlene has been doing this longer than many neighborhood residents have been alive, and it shows. You may not get a free Miller High Life with your haircut, but you'll have enough money left over to buy a six-pack. KAT MERCK.
A $10 haircut downtown
Beau Monde Beauty School (1221 SW 12th Ave., 226-7355, beaumondecollege.com. 10:30 am-9:30 pm Tuesday-Friday, 9:30 am-5 pm Saturday).
The pecking order goes: level 2, level 3, and "salon-ready" for stylists at Beau Monde, but you'll pay the same for any of the three. Walk-ins are welcome but appointments encouraged on busy Fridays and Saturdays. You can request a certain level when booking or take your chances. For some reason, shampooing has the only price levels: $4 for a novice sudser, $9 for a pro. Warning: Calling ahead will subject you to the most awkward hold-line recording playing on a loop. ENID SPITZ.
A $6 haircut in Hollywood
Phagans' School of Hair Design (1542 NE Weidler St., 239-0838, phagans.com. 10 am-10 pm Tuesday-Friday, 9 am-4 pm Saturday).
Last call at Phagans' is 8:30 pm, later than most, but they say definitely book ahead. Occasional specials pop up, like $6 haircuts in March (usually $8), but otherwise prices are fixed even for different experience levels. No requests here; you get the next available pair of hands whether they're a freshman or senior. ENID SPITZ.
A $5 cut and $2 blow-dry on Northeast 82nd
Portland Beauty School (8230 NE Siskiyou St., 255-6303, portlandbeautyschool.com. 10 am-8 pm Tuesday-Friday, 9 am-5 pm Saturday).
Cheapest in the land, Portland Beauty School trims locks at 5 bucks a pop if you make the trip out to Northeast. They strongly advise appointments, but you can't request an experience level, so cross your fingers and hope for the best. If it's a bust, you can always get your wig styled for $8. ENID SPITZ.