Back in the ancient past of the 1970s and 1980s, some clever queens devised the now-legendary "Hankie Code" to save time in discovering a potential shag's sexual proclivities. The code--a colored hanky poking out of a back pocket--has fallen into disuse, yet it seems that this kind of courtship convenience might help straight people avoid needless conversation before falling into bed. In an effort to help active heterosexuals save time, we've updated the traditional gay code, and you never know--this shorthand might just catch on.
HANKIE | GAY MEANING | STRAIGHT MEANING |
Mauve | Into navel worship | Into Mystic Tanning |
Mustard | Has 8 inches or more | Has a V8 or more |
Black | Into heavy S&M | Into applying Neosporin |
Mosquito netting | Outdoor sex | Outdoor sex |
Charcoal | Latex fetish | BBQ fetish |
Lime green | Dines off tricks | Dines off china |
Silver | Starfucker | Once saw Sean Astin at the airport |
Olive | Likes uniforms | Likes martinis |
Gray | Bondage | Good with boating knots |
Gold | 2 looking for 1 | Coupon clipper |
Toothbrush | Lover's out, my place is OK | Halitosis is out, my breath's OK |
Cocktail napkin | Into bartenders | Into cocktail parties |
Rust | Cowboy fetish | Reagan fetish |
Gold lamé | Into musclemen | Into 24 Hour Fitness clubs |
Robin's-egg blue | Sixty-niner | Sixty-niner |
Fuschia | Prefers spanking | Prefers the suburbs |
Back to "
" table of contents.
WWeek 2015