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There was a true miracle on Southwest 3rd Avenue, when fat, frosty snowflakes began falling on Saturday’s Stumptown SantaCon. It appeared that Santa, the god of Christmas, approved of the street closures and drunken people in Santawear—the women dressed disproportionately sexy to the men—dancing to Ariana Grande in his name. Let us never ridicule them again or risk his wrath.