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Ever wonder what it takes to become a U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement officer under the Trump administration? Freelance journalist Laura Jedeed has the answer: Not much.
Jedeed, 38, decided to test the ICE hiring system herself last August by pulling up to an ICE career expo in Arlington, Texas, that promised on-the-spot hiring and a $50,000 signing bonus.
On paper, Jedeed is a viable candidate for what she calls “America’s Gestapo-in-waiting.” She grew up conservative in Colorado, weaned on books by libertarian icon Ayn Rand. She joined the army after high school and deployed to Afghanistan twice with the 82nd Airborne Division.
But a glance at her second act, much of it spent in Portland, should make her a hard pass for ICE brass looking for muscle in its Minneapolis show of force. After her second tour in Afghanistan, Jedeed determined that the war there was bullshit. Her superiors didn’t know the basic facts needed to build a peaceful nation, like the structure of 20 ethnic groups and the myriad clans in each one.
Jedeed switched careers and became a journalist. She got a bachelor’s degree from Reed College—not exactly an ICE feeder school—and interned for U.S. Rep. Earl Blumenauer (D-Oregon). Her Reed thesis was titled Making Monsters: Right-Wing Creation of the Liberal Enemy. She became a journalist and wrote a story for WW about a ring-wing protester firing gunshots—her first hard news byline.
Given her sharp left turn, and an easy-to-find AntifaWatch dossier on her, Jedeed figured she had no chance of becoming one of President Donald Trump’s brownshirts. But ICE surprised her. She got a tentative offer on Sept. 3, pending a background check and a drug test. Weed is legal in New York City, where Jedeed now lives, and she had smoked six days before.
But even that didn’t disqualify her. Nor did the fact that she hadn’t filled out any of the required paperwork or signed a single document. She logged onto USAJobs and learned that she had become an agent. Jedeed detailed her bonkers ICE experience in a story for Slate on Jan. 13, titled You’ve Heard About Who ICE Is Recruiting. The Truth Is Far Worse. I’m the Proof.
Jedeed’s story lit up the Internet and the mainstream media. She’s been on all the major networks, even CBS, now run by Trump cheek-kisser Bari Weiss.
WW caught up with Jedeed on Jan. 17, because we just had to hear about how one of our alumna grabbed a piece of the biggest, most terrifying story in America right now. Questions and answers have been edited for length and clarity.
WW: How did you go from being a soldier in the 82nd Airborne to being on AntifaWatch?
Laura Jedeed: One very much has to do with the other. I joined the military because I really believed in the War on Terror. I grew up in a family that votes Republican. I watched a lot of Fox News. I enlisted and went to Afghanistan, and it became really clear really quickly that in no way were we bringing democracy to people who were yearning for it. We were shoving our ideas down the throats of a very proud people who did not want us there. It made me wonder what else I’d been lied to about if they lied to me about this.
What gave you the idea for the story?
A lot of my journalism over the years has involved going into conservative spaces. It’s how I got my start. I do a lot of work on writing about conservatives, why they believe what they believe. We were seeing ICE’s recruitment pushes everywhere, and of course they were going after veterans. I thought, “I bet I could make myself look pretty good if I did a skills-based resume and was a little bit coy about the last seven years.” I felt like I could maybe get in for the first round. And that would be a cool way to maybe get a little bit more in-depth on this hiring event, which somebody who reads my Substack told me about.
What happened when you got to the expo in Arlington?
There was no line to get in, no line for security. There were six people in line for interviews. It moved quickly. There was a very normal-seeming middle-aged woman who had me sit down across from her at a card table and ask me some very basic questions, like name, date of birth, how long I had served, duty station preference, and that was it. It took six minutes. I timed it.
And it was optional to talk with an ICE officer, which you did?
Yeah, and it was a fine conversation. He said most of the people he talked with were really eager to get out there and put cuffs on people. So he was trying to temper expectations. He said I might get a paper pushing job for the first six months, “but we will get you out there. We want everyone out there.”
Have you heard anything from the Trump administration since the story ran?
After about a day of this story blowing up, the Department of Homeland Security responded, calling it a lazy lie. They said “We sometimes send tentative offer letters, and that doesn’t mean anything.” So I just went ahead and posted the screen grab from the ICE portal. Maybe “final offer” doesn’t mean “final offer to ICE,” but they’ve never explained it. I reached out to them for a comment. They never responded.
Have you considered sending Kristi Noem a thank-you note for blasting your journalism career into hyperspace?
I have a Substack. I announced the article there and thanked the Bog Trolls at ICE for giving me so much more that I’d asked for. So maybe I should write her personally and let her know.
Do you have any tips for how to stay sane with masked men terrorizing people of color and shooting American moms in the face?
You have to find a way to laugh. That’s my coping mechanism. It’s not funny except as dark humor. There’s a quote in my favorite book, Deep Survival by Laurence Gonzalez. It says: “Laughter is the body’s way of telling itself that things are all right.” I try to find whatever humor I can without downplaying the severity of the situation.
