"God Hates Portland Trail Blazers," According to Westboro Baptist Church

Kansas-based hate group plans to protest outside Moda Center this Saturday.

The Westboro Baptist Church, doing what they do, in 2011.

Everyone's (least) favorite extremist Christian trolls, the Westboro Baptist Church, are coming to Portland this weekend, and have announced their intent to take in a Blazers game. 

Excuse me, that should read take on a Blazers game. According to a press release faxed to the WW office, the Topeka-based ministry—known for picketing everything from the Holocaust Museum to the funeral of Ronnie James Dio—is planning to protest outside Moda Center this Saturday, Jan. 10. 

What allegedly got the Blazers on God's naughty list? Unlike what you might expect, it has nothing to do with Meyers Leonard. In October 2013, the team became the first professional sports franchise to come out in favor of gay marriage, voicing support for the Freedom to Marry and Religious Protection ballot initiative. Naturally, that rankled the "God Hates Fags" brigade.

"The Portland Trail Blazers punched the Lord Jesus Christ in the face," reads the press release, which goes on to quote passages from the New Testament. "There was absolutely no reason for the Portland Trail Blazers to throw in their lot with the fags except to gratuitously kiss fag ass. The Portland Trail Blazers should REPENT and apologize to God."

The Blazers aren't the only abomination the church plans to visit on its Northwest vacation. The group also plans to picket outside churches in Boring, Salem, Portland and Gresham for apparently not hating homosexuals enough. (In Gresham, they lamented the tragic end of anti-gay-wedding-cake bakery Sweet Cakes for Melissa.) The morning before the Blazers game, protesters are also scheduled to gather outside the Gay Christian Network Conference taking place at the Oregon Convention Center.

Of course, in the season and a half since the team proclaimed its support of gay marriage, the Blazers have become one of the elite teams in the Western Conference, so maybe the WBC should double-check with God before coming all the way out here. Just a thought.

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