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In this week’s cover story, Dr. Know presents a six-step plan for burnishing Portland’s reputation. (But not too much.) We asked WW staffers to voice ideas of their own. They did.
I personally will vote for whichever mayoral candidate would make street signs in this town actually reflective, even if we have to make schoolchildren sell cupcakes every weekend to keep the Portland Bureau of Transportation funded.
I don’t want to see any empty grass median strips between the sidewalk and street. Any that aren’t being used should be seeded with native pollinator mixes!
Any RV or camper reported for extended idling or generating neighborhood complaints should be given a one-time opportunity to rebrand itself as a food truck (must serve at least one hot item) in order to avoid civil penalties.
Enlist a trees of heaven death squad. Place a bounty on killing and removing these invasive plants.
Raise parking meter rates around all vaguely touristy Portland sites to $10 an hour during the summer. Make public transit to the same sites free or refundable.
If the campaign to save Lloyd Center fails, turn attention to Mall 205. East of 82nd deserves a huge, thriving, quirky indie artsy shopping center too.
Build a Wild West-themed water park on the site of the Gateway Fred Meyer using Portland Clean Energy Fund dollars. Charge anyone living east of 82nd a nickel per visit, and everybody else $20. As the climate warms, water slides are climate justice.
Juice up the Biketown system so the docks are more ubiquitous, so you don’t need to seek one out with your phone. Also, make it so it’s free to use if you have an annual membership, like the blue non-e-bikes in the New York City system are. No ticky-tacky, 25-cents-per-minute add-on.
Erect a zip line from the top of Big Pink to the top of the old Louis Dreyfus grain elevator.
The state should implement a toll on cars with Washington plates to cross the bridge into Oregon from Vancouver to offset the low property taxes paid in Washington by motorists shopping and working in Oregon. Or raise liquor taxes for anyone presenting a Washington state ID at an Oregon bar or liquor store. Especially if they’re driving. Especially if they’re driving in Northwest Portland, because one of these days one of those people is going to kill me in particular.
Make it harder to file ballot measures. Maybe a lifetime limit on the number of ballot measures you can file, known as the Sizemore Cap. That’s more of a prescription for Oregon, but I’m right.
Got suggestions of your own? Send them to newstips@wweek.com.
