Safehouse Taproom: 1919 Main Street, Vancouver, Wash., 360-503-7649, 4-10 pm Monday-Wednesday, 4-11 pm Friday-Saturday, noon-11 pm Saturday, noon-8 pm Sunday.
Brewery: 421 C St., Washougal, Wash., 360-335-9909, 4-10 pm Wednesday-Friday, noon-10 pm Saturday, 2-8 pm Sunday.

Across from Vancouver's O.G. weed shop and music store—the cool-kid and burnout section of our northern suburb's downtown—Washougal's Doomsday Brewing has opened a new "Safehouse" that's like a drunk Wes Craven's idea of a bar. The wall is home to a nuclear symbols and a giant yawning skull that seems to be made out of old tire rubber, not to mention a wall-size depiction of the apocalypse in which a gasmasked horseman carries a beer bottle and a paddle made of Jesusfish. The bathroom door is marked "gender irrelevant," while the exit door is adjacent to a chalkboard definition for "beergasm" and the largest box of Cards Against Humanity we've heretofore seen in this life. The beers don't really play it safe, either: The Orange Peel IPA is all peel-happy zest and tropical hop, the Black Out chocolate stout is like liquid nibs and the Come At Me Bro! double IPA is a genuinely apocalyptic 120 IBUs—showing that the bitter-hop wars have not subsided in Vancouver, and that it might kill us all.

Drink this: Black Out. So much chocolate.